One week ago, I met up with my boys to have one final Bible study small group at my house. It was an amazing night of being able to teach them. In the past few months, I have been able to stand aside and watch their faith grow to wonderful levels. I’m so proud of them, and I will really miss them this semester. But, I look forward to seeing what they will accomplish through Christ while I am not around.
I would characterize my Summer by one word: inconsistency. It has crippled my passion and wrought the very essentials of my life with confusion and darkness. And now, God is bringing me out again. I don’t know. Something about being here (away from home) is really fresh for me and allowing God to do some wonderful work in my life. However, often synonomous with “wonderful work” is “crippling pain”. Today was one of those days I’d just rather not have. One of those days where it takes all that you possess to produce even a smirk, much less a smile. But, still, I will proceed with joy in my heart, for I have realized one undeniable and amazing fact: God knows what he is doing…
being a child of God, there is nothing in my life that can happen without his knowledge. Thus, every single thing that happens to me has a specific purpose, even the painful stuff. In fact, the painful stuff all the more. For when I am humbled to my knees, I am in the place where I can best receive all that God has to give me. The place where I am silent enough to hear him speak. The place where I am forced to allow less of me…and crave more of him. And that’s cool. And I must proceed with the sure hope that God will not only love and comfort me during this time, but also that his purpose will most certainly prevail.
SRay
August 24th, 2005 at 12:48 pm
well as weird as this is gonna sounds….there is a bright side….you werent inconsistent…but CONSISTENT on being inconsisten…so at least you ahve that…lol anyway your in my prayers
August 24th, 2005 at 2:23 pm
I’m sorry you had one of those “don’t even want to smirk” days…if I was @ OBU right now…I’d spot you from far away, start dancing/jumping and sing your name and make up a little song about how I see you right now etc (you know how it goes…b/c i’ve done it more than once) I think that might make you laugh. (just imagine me doing it right now!!! isn’t that funny! Yay!)
You wouldn’t be going through a hard/tough/emotional time if there wasn’t something or some sort of life lesson to learn. When you feel discouraged…find the positive in the situation and ask God what it is you are to learn
I love you Stephen Ray! Have an awesomely blessed day!!!!!!!
August 26th, 2005 at 10:05 am
stephen ray hows it goin it havent talked to u in a while wat up just finally checkin my xanga comment me back.
August 28th, 2005 at 4:32 pm
Inconsistency serves to remind us daily that we aren’t perfect. Sometimes that’s the the only thought that keeps me from ringing my own neck!
I wish I was there to get a great big SRay hug and hear you’re sweet voice. It always makes my day 1000 times more beautiful!